Thursday, October 23, 2008

Survival of the Fitness!!!!



Who is that white guy above?
He was Herbert Spencer and he coined the phrase, "Survival of the Fittest."

P.S. Everyone thinks it was Charles Darwin's with his theories of evolution,
whatever the case ( and who gives a fuck) the idea is SURVIVAL!!!

In Inwood this fall it's all about Survival.
Surviving the Bad Weather
Surviving the loco style schedule that had people playing 3 or 4 games a week
Surviving your Players leaving your game early
Surviving Players Quiting
Surviving Players Losing Interest
Surviving The Umpiring
Do or Die!!


The Standings as of today are as follows:

W L RS RA Diff pct
Westlanders 9 1 82 27 55 90.00%
Twins 8 2 90 29 61 80.00%
Tainos 7 3 57 44 13 70.00%
Jicome All Stars 7 3 46 34 12 70.00%
Knockout 7 3 48 44 4 70.00%
Bizcocheros 6 4 48 40 8 60.00%
Crimminals 5 5 70 36 34 50.00%
Keenans Sidewinders 5 5 64 75 -11 50.00%
Hawksquad 4 6 64 66 -2 40.00%
Sajoma 4 7 42 57 -15 36.36%
Chaos 3 7 38 72 -34 30.00%
Panthers 2 5 46 77 -31 28.57%
Tigers 2 8 58 92 -34 20.00%
Legends 0 10 39 99 -60 0.00%
Jicome vs Panthers to continue 1 inning, 6-4 Jic., top 7th)
With the playoffs only 1 week away there are at least 7-8 top teams in the league all with realistic championship aspirations.

Only 1 will Survive

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

All that and a Bag of Bomber Chips


The ghetto saying goes "I'm all that and a bag of Chips",


well yesterday my team the Bombers felt that way as we Won The Championship on Central Park's Great Lawn in the NY Fast Pitch League.

  • We didn't win any real money.
  • We didn't win any out of style jackets
  • We didn't win any dust collecting Trophies like MLB's World Series trophy

What we won is Satisfaction and a Sense of Accomplishment/Pride that we outlasted the greatest pitcher in softball Caquito in a 3 game series.

Don't get me wrong Caquito was magnificent in the series. he single handily carried his team throughout the 3 games.


  • Game One was a 9 inning classic in which Caquito struck out about 15 batters and we found a way to win 1-0.
  • Game Two was another classic as we managed only one hit yet rallied from a 2-0 deficit to tie the game and force extra innings only to lose 3-2.
  • Game Three was amazing as we got key two out hits in the 1st, 2nd and 3rd inning to build an insurmountable 5-0 lead after 3 and 1/2 innings.
The one downer throughout was that all the games were never finished in one day due to darkness so the constant continuations were annoying.This was highlighted in game 3 as Weintraub ( our opponent), perhaps sensing defeat b/c they trailed 5-0, only fielded 8 players and had no Caquito making the last 3 innings anti-climatic and sort of meaningless.

Nonetheless, this Bomber team did truly earn the Championship as evidence by scoring 5 runs off the best legal modified pitcher in softball in a Do or Die situation .I found this Bomber team gratifying to play on for a variety of reasons the biggest of which was that while we had the best team we were not a sure thing to win it all. I had won the Championship two years in a row in this league while playing on a excellent Lawyertime team led by Softball Studs, Simon, Lou 22, Elvis, Castillo, Cabezza, etc.There was no way we were losing this league.

No way.

The Bombers had an excellent blend of young talent and unselfish gritty veterans that got the job done.I am very proud of this team and everyone on it.

HOLLER!!!!!!!!!


PS Of course I am writing a Top Ten about the Bombers Championship


Top Ten Reasons the Bombers Won the NYC Fast Pitch Great Lawn League


10. We were the only losers that could field 9 guys at ridiculously early 5:30 games that only lasted 3 1/3 innings in October.

9. Andy Santana- excellent player and GM - A Shout out to all the Santana bothers!!!

8. Lawyertime was not in the league - I ain't gonna lie it made it easier

7. Caquito was literally a one man show in the Chip - thank god that he didn't get any help or we would have been toast

6. Defense - best in the league

5, Sito - Simply a Beast on both sides of the ball.

True impact player and one of the best SS in all of softball.

4. Leadership - The Bombers version of Obama was Anthony - great guy great attitude

3. John Rosenmiller smoked his cigarettes away from all his teammates and avoided giving them second hand smoke

2.Teammates avoided jail by not killing obnoxious Ricky.

and the Number One Reasons the Bombers Won the NYC Fast Pitch Great Lawn League

1. We deserved it. Holler!!!!!!!!!

On a side note this is the only chip I have won this year.It ain't easy winning when you didn't play with Castillo or Lou 22 this year.

Monday, October 13, 2008

END OF INWOOD?

Inwood Fall Softball has been around ten years.
It's been an excellent run, but the handwriting is on the wall that the end is near.

Top Ten Reasons Inwood Fall Softball may be coming to an end

10. We're a small mom and pop softball league, Big Softball business like Fat Freddy and CJ's league are wiping us out and their is no government bailout plan to save us.
9. Retards who attack umpires and start fight make the league no fun to run.
8. 3 Rain outs this year - Softball gods are telling us to get out
7. Bi-Annual Knockout team - talented but draining
6. Chelo is becoming too expensive and belligerent to deal with much less understand
5. People can't pay their league fees on time and we waste all our time trying to shake them down. Dealing with excuse after excuse is disrespectful, annoying and childish
4. Gentrification - the 96th street barrier has slowly been extending uptown over the years. It's only a matter of time before the Inwood field permits are revoked. The fields will be replaced with picnickers sipping wine and eating cheese.
3. Sick of people getting psycho on us complaining about bullshit we have no control over like the weather, an umpires call, etc.
2. It's hard to get good umps. The overall quality of the umpiring has been down this year due to various reasons specifically the one umpire format.

and the Number One Reasons Inwood Fall Softball may be coming to an end

1. All the Above



1.

Friday, October 10, 2008

MARIANO RIVERA PLAYS SOFTBALL

I'm a Met fan and I hate the Yankees, but even the most hardcore Met fan knows
that Yankee legend Mariano Rivera is the greatest closer of all time.


The effortless motion, the late movement with his cutter, the composure, the endless number of clutch championship performances.
Stud.
What makes it even more amazing is the guy is quiet, skinny, humble, and really looks more like a local bodega owner than a ballplayer.


He wants to be a preacher or something religious like that when he retires. Unreal

Well, softball has a version of Mariano Rivera and his name is Caquito.
The guy is the real deal!!!!
He just flat out brings it and like Mariano he looks like some little bodega store owner.
For years I have heard nothing but praise regarding Caquito and for once the hype was right on the money.
He throws fast, I mean really fast.
Has outstanding control and command on both sides of the plate.
His riser not only "rises" but also bites in and out extremely hard.
His change up is lethal.
The guy is fucking awesome and oh yeah he is a 100% legal modified pitcher.

The rumors are that he lives in the Dominican Republic in the winter and gets paid to pitch in NYC from April through October. He's that good.

Whatever.

Caquito, softball's version of Mariano Rivera is simply excellent.

Monday, October 6, 2008

I WON'T BE IGNORED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The legendary movie "Fatal attraction" has become a household term for love turned to murderous obsession.



Well the love of Softball can turn into an obsession and last Sunday I fear my friend and Exalted Ruler of Highlander Nation Dio Jackson crossed over and experienced Softball Fatal Attraction




In the movie it all started innocently over drinks as married man Michael Douglas met a 1980's houchie played by Glen Close, and they got busy.




Well in Inwood it all started innocently as well Rick, Blonde, and Dio were Good Friends enjoying many special moments such as the Highlanders epic 2005 Championship win over Inwood Dynasty West.


In the movie Fatal Attraction Michael Douglas had to tell Glenn close that it was over b/c he loved his wife and family and couldn't go on living a lie.
Glenn didn't take the news that well and started acting weird and psychotic!!!
Blurting out her legendary "I WON'T BE IGNORED!!!" quote


Well in the first 5 weeks of Inwood this year we have experienced 3 disappointing rain outs.
Each week we had to tell the managers that the games were cancelled and most took it in stride all except for Dio.

Over the years Dio has always been well ... let's say unique.
For example, his softball obsession spills over to reality every year as he dress up for Halloween every year.


But this last unexpected rain out sent him over the edge.

Top Ten Reason Dio Turned into softball Fatal Attraction Version of Glenn Close last week

10. He had to stay home and pack all day instead - brutal - double punishment
9. He was Upset that his lookalike hero Ozzie Guillen team the White Sox were eliminated from the MLB playoffs and vented


8. Thinks Blonde is Jesus Christ and Rick is his apostle and is disappointed that we can't make miracles like part the waters on sunken fields so that games can go on
7. Wanted to get his Goon on
6. Frustration
5. Dio is going to dress as Glenn Close for Halloween and is just practicing his part.
He even is going to get the bad perm.



Further upsetting Dio was the he offered the role of Michael Douglass to John Sheppard, but John told him fuck off psycho!!! This sent Dio into an uncontrollable rage.


4. He was very upset that he wasn't going to be able to get his Inwood Bar Fly on!!!!
3. Didn't want to be treated like just another manager.
Just another cheap thrill.
Just another league fee.
So bombarded the league with phone calls and text messages that resembled a stalking jilted ex-lover and he "WASN'T GOING TO BE IGNORED!!!!!!"
2. It was 8AM on a Sunday morning and Rick/Juan were the only retards hat he could vent on

and the number one Reason Dio Turned into softball Fatal Attraction Version of Glenn Close last week

1. No lineups to write.
No speeches.
No arguments.
Softball is more than just game to him. Much more